Where is everyone?

Is it always as quiet as this?

Yes it is jtheb, Elaine mentioned to re-open it and it seems its only 3 or 4 of us who look in, facebook has caused a lot of problems and its not been helpful for forums, but maybe this will eventualy pick up nige and Elaine and myself pop in most

I will try to be here several times a day.

I'm not usually online much at the weekends, but I'm trying to sell a few bits so I've been checking them out.
It is quiet, but someone will always be along eventually xxx

I will tend to be around later in the week (Thu - Sat). My main teaching this year is Mon - Wed.

Still not online at home, so tend to visit once during the day...

I am on line a lot apart from housework, i have nothing else to do

I know the feeling.

I drop in frequently during the day.

Message flagged
Monday, 15 October 2012, 10:46

Puns for Educated Minds


1.
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was
Sir Cumference. (Too much pi.)

2.
I thought I saw an eye-doctor on an Alaskan island,
but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .

3.
She was only a whisky-maker, but he loved her still.

4.
A rubber-band pistol was confiscated from an algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5.
No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

6.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road
and was cited for littering.

7.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would
result in Linoleum Blownapart.

8.
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.

9.
A hole has been found in the nudist-camp wall.
The police are looking into it.

10.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

12.
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'

13.
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

14.
A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said:
'Keep off the Grass.'

15.
The midget fortune-teller who escaped from
prison was a small medium at large.

16.
The soldier who survived mustard gas and
pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

17.
A backward poet writes inverse.

18.
In a democracy it's your vote that counts.
In feudalism it's your count that votes.

19.
When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

20.
If you jumped off the bridge in Paris , you'd be in Seine .

21.
A vulture carrying two dead raccoons boards an airplane. The stewardess looks at him and says,
'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.'

22.
Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
One turns to the other and says, 'Dam!'


23.
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again
that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

24.
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says, 'Are you sure?'
The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'

25.
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain
during a root-canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.

26.
There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

That gave me quite a laugh, I enjoyed them very much

Ijust had them sent me by a ex colleague from work. We swop lokes all the time.

I put the one about tha Athiest on Facebook, it's had a few likes,

Ive just used the Cannibal one thats so funny

I'm here on and off.

See you all later (if you are here)

Very funny puns!

I think there's a potential market for good stand-up Christian comedians...

Told my parents I'm thinking of becoming an undertaker. They are dead against that idea!

I have through the years been told loads of jokes, but I've forgotten them all

Never mind.

My father used to say "We are in the world to help others. But I don't know what the others are here for"

Rain and wind today, with the sun just starting to peep through as I type, I feel like one of the others today who feel they need help, my daughter Lorraine is coming to see us for the weekend with Darren and the kids so its all guns blazing this weekend. By monday I will be ready to collapse

I would love to have my kids come to stay but we do not have space even though we have a four bedrooms.

It does weigh on me rather.

Neither of us is wellenough to tidy up.

Looking at the membership list it is sad how many members don't and some have never posted.

I find it odd and sad I did spread the word but it doesnt seem to have worked John. There seems to be only elaine Nigel and me and rarely Hetty.


I am shocked to see you dont have any help, Dont you bot have a carer to tidy up for you both?

No regular help. We have a couple of refugee families who do an occasional tidy for us.

Eileen is not keen on letting people loose in the house. And my stuff is only inteligible to me.
It is a bit worrying. We could never get tidied enogh to move house.

Fresh hope is fairly busy, and I go there quite a lot. (it does need careful handling)

Tim Vine's joke booke is very good, mostly 1-liners, all clean and good fun.

Dreadfully quiet.

I've just done a bit of tidying. So I'm exhausted.

See you late (if there is anyone to see)

I'm getting lonely.